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Photo by Mike Bitzenhofer
Expecting parents know the gauntlet of baby gear pushed and prodded their way through the store’s aisles. Modern-day culture all but convinces the average parent-to-be that they may very well fail at their upcoming task without the shiny new products begging for purchase. Never mind that men and women have parented children for eons without most of these things.
I have recently walked the “expecting parent” route, having two preschool children, and I registered for gifts with both. But my lists were small, because we really didn’t want to have stuff for the sake of stuff. We only wanted things that would enhance our home and our new life with a baby.
Here are a few items I opted not to get - and did just fine without.
More Than One Stroller
Instead of going with multiple sizes of strollers (or even more cumbersome, a “travel system,”) we bought a well-made, rather glorified umbrella stroller. We made sure it was a stroller that both of us could easily push (my husband and I are a foot apart in height), and that it was well-made with sturdy wheels. Two kids, almost four years, a bajillion airports, and who knows how many countries later, it’s still in use.
Shopping Cart Cover
I’m just not a germophobe. Never have been. My mother never covered the shopping cart seat before sitting me in, and I’m fine and healthy today. So I figured I didn’t really need to do that with my kids - and as of yet, both very rarely get ill. The over-sanitizing of our culture is another topic altogether, but I believe that, within reason, everyday items like shopping carts are perfectly safe for my kids.
Baby Wipe Warmers
On the rare occasion I felt like I needed a slightly warmer wipe, I rubbed it in my hands for a few seconds. Walla - a much warmer wipe, without the extra cost or clutter.
Full-Size Highchair
We were given one for free with our second child, and I can honestly say that having a big highchair with its own tray is pretty much the same as having a portable highchair strapped to a regular chair pushed up to the dining table. Plus, they take up so much less room, and the baby can eat right next to the rest of the family.
Diaper Pail
We had a Diaper Champ with our daughter, but with our son, we just have a standard trash can that you open with a foot lever. We keep it outside on our balcony, and I think this simple method has kept our home much less smelly than an indoor diaper pail.
Baby Detergent
I know there are some special cases when certain babies have ultra-sensitive skin. But since day one, I’ve washed my babies’ clothing alongside the rest of the families’ with the same laundry soap - and we’ve had no issues.
Changing Table
With our oldest, my husband made a nifty catch-all type piece of furniture with shelves and a dowel for hanging baby dresses (it didn’t hurt that he was a carpenter). We put a changing pad on top, and used that as our changing table. With our son, we simply put a changing pad on top of his dresser. There’s no need to take up valuable square footage with a piece of furniture that does just one thing.
Glider
I’ve never been a fan of the aesthetics of a typical glider, but the main reason we didn’t get one is because of price. Nevertheless, the wooden rocking chair I inherited from my grandmother worked just as well with my daughter, and with my son, we just rock our body back and forth while we snuggle. Amazingly enough, he doesn’t seem to mind.
Baby Lotion
I still have some from our almost four-year-old daughter. Babies have the softest, sweetest-smelling skin on their own, and I can’t think of any lotion that would enhance it.
To see some of my ideas of what is truly useful, check out my baby registry recommendations on Wishpot. And if you are expecting, I recommend making your registry there - you can include anything on the internet in your list. No longer do you have to stick to just one store.
What do you think on these items - were any of them a valuable help for you during the baby days? What would you add to the list? What would you take away? Let’s dispel the myth that you need a ton of stuff for the newest, tiniest members of a family.
Here are some related posts from Simple Mom:
- Making Nutritious, Simple Baby Food From Scratch
- Personal Finance 101 - The $1k Baby Emergency Fund
- Personal Finance 101 - Dave Ramsey’s Baby Steps
- What’s your Personal Focus for July?
- Gift Giving & Wishing Made Easy
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{ 50 comments… read them below or add one }
I, along with you, think that there are many items out there that are just flat out unnecessary. But there are a few on this list that I did use and thought were useful.
More than one stroller–We were given a double stroller and it was a huge blessing! Our children our 20 months apart. Our oldest was born with complex heart defects (has had three open heart surgeries) and our youngest was a 28 week preemie. When he finally came home and then a few months later when he could be out in public, he was still very little (about 6.5 lb.) and had monitors. Because of our daughters heart problem, her stamina is just not that of other children. She can walk awhile, but then she has to rest. So a double stroller worked really well with one who couldn’t walk really long and one who had a big monitor to lug around.
Changing table–I will agree that this is a luxury because a child can be changed practically anywhere! We thought about putting a changing pad on top of our daughters dresser (mine from when I was growing up) but it was too tall and awkward. I am tall (5′ 10″) and it was still too high. We were given money to buy a changing table and it was a great help. But it does take up valuable floor space.
Baby detergent–I used regular detergent with our first baby, but because our second was a preemie, his skin was very sensitive. Also his lungs were very sensitive to any kind of fragrance. I used Dreft, and even though it’s expensive, it was a must and worked great. Once he was about 7 months old I switched back to regular detergent.
And you are so right…wipe warmers and diaper genies are totally overrated!! =)
I think this is a great post and it will be very helpful to first time parents who think they can’t be successful parents without all of the stuff they see in baby magazines.
Laine Chambers’s last blog post…Morning Glory Muffins
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
Absolutely on the issues with your particular family. Just goes to show you how personal most of these decisions are.
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How about a baby bathtub? I had one for baby #1, but got rid of it for 2-6. Those things take up space and aren’t very attractive. I found that for something that doesn’t work for very long, it’s just easier to bathe the baby in the sink or in the tub with Mom or Dad—-just have someone there to put the baby in and take him out. Even laying the baby on the floor of the tub, on a towel, with a bare 1/2 inch of water, works.
Sara’s last blog post…Sixth Folder, Sixth Picture
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Just wanted to say I find myself coming back to your site more than once a day! You have so many great articles and ideas. We are expecting a baby in late November/ Dec. and although some of the items on your list we did receive either as gifts or recycled- hand-me-downs, I still found it to be helpful. Last night my hubbie and I read your envelope method article and I think I’ve finally convinced him to let us start it.
Thank you!
melissa
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we were astounded at the number of baby products on the market when our son was born - and i’m pretty sure there are about 5 million more now! i agree that alot of them are not “needs” but “wants”, and it’s entirely possible to live without them.
we had a rocking chair on loan from my parents when my son was born - it was lovely, painted white by my dad… and the most uncomfortable chair i have ever sat in! my back was in really bad shape after my pregnancy, and the curve on that chair was horrendous for people who are taller than average, which both my husband and i are. i would have traded that for a glider in a heartbeat. where we live there is a very large consignment sale of baby and children’s goods, twice a year. we’ve already decided that should God bless us with another miracle, we’ll be heading to that sale and looking for a glider!
i agree with the first comment about the changing table as well - the dresser we have for our son is too high to be remotely safe as a change table, and it happened that we were given one as a gift.
but in general - my husband always says that if you think you might want or need something for your child, it already exists and can be found in 50 different sizes and colors…. and most of it is stuff you can live without!
Krista’s last blog post…The Vivanno - or, why I love Starbucks
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I like to tell first-time pregnant moms that all they need on Day 1 is a carseat (at least here in the U.S., you can’t leave the hospital without one — unless you’re planning on walking home, that is!) and a pile of diapers. The hospital will swaddle the baby in a blanket, and the baby can sleep in bed with you in between nursing sessions. Talk about simple!
Karen’s last blog post…Ten on Tuesday*
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Michelle Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 12:06 am
You and I must be kin. It’s long been my assertion that all a baby needs is boobs, clothes, diapers, and a carseat. (Like you said, the hospital will provide at least a couple of outfits and blankets, and usually a pack of diapers! But I prefer having them at home.) Everything else is gravy.
I do have a double stroller, which is very nice for taking all 7 kids on a walk. (One in the sling, two in the stroller, and 4 walking!) But I almost never use it otherwise. As for changing diapers, I do that on the bed, the couch, the floor, anywhere. I’ve never seen the need for a changing table.
We have a highchair, but it’s mainly only useful because we don’t have enough chairs otherwise.
Michelle’s last blog post…I almost do have a child for every day of the week!
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I agree with you on all of these! And I would have to add that most of the baby feeding equipment is unnecessary as well. I don’t want to get into a discussion of breast versus bottle feeding, but once you get into the solids stage, you don’t need baby food cookers, or special spoons or plates, or choppers or mixers… We have three sippy cups, that we’ve used for all three kids and that’s about all we need.
Kelly from Almost Frugal’s last blog post…The Hidden Costs of Going Back to School
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I 100% agree with everything on this list. After three babies, I still don’t understand diaper genies or shopping cart covers. One note: standard laundry detergent was fine with two of mine, but my oldest was sensitive enough to need mild baby detergent.
One thing I would add: the bumbo chair. I received one as a gift for our third and used it only once to take a picture. It was used instead by my preschoolers, one time as a potty (oh yes, she did) and many times as a helmet to bounce off walls. We didn’t have it for long!
Great list, I really hope this helps new moms who are bombarded by the “must have” lists!
Nikki’s last blog post…Just a Friendly Note
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
That’s interesting; I’ve actually really gotten some mileage out of my son’s Bumbo. We didn’t have one with my daughter, and we were fine. But I’ve really been thankful to have had one with my son - we use it all the time, from playtime to meals to even bathing some times.
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I completely disagree about the shopping cart cover. It’s still useful to me and our two year old daughter.
First because she is a horrid teether and when she was an infant, would have gnawed on the cart handle nonstop - she had a death clench with her mouth.
But now it’s even more useful as she’s a skinny kid. So we use the cart cover in restaurant high chairs and in shopping carts to keep her in there. The padding helps her stay upright and comfortable. AND it makes cleanup at the restaurant much easier as all the food falls in there - just fold it up and shake it out in the parking lot.
It’s definitely not something every family needs, I suppose. And we have a hand made one but still, it’s not just about germs. There are other uses for it.
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Hear, hear!! Thank you for your very sane post! We have six kids and the more we have, the less I find need for baby/child related stuff. (We actually own, but almost never use a stroller — we carry them until they are old enough to walk and then they walk! We do save the stroller for longer walks when toddlers are too heavy to carry for long periods.) We also do without bottles, soothers, diaper bag, disposable diapers, swim diapers, the baby bathtub, ‘baby’ food (they eat what we eat), a whole whack of toys — particularly, we have few baby toys, as babies get bored of ‘toys’ very quickly and much prefer a wooden spoon — and we have no ‘nursery (babies are with us and then directly in with a sibling). I think what it comes down to is that many people who normally avoid materialism and overspending can easily be entrapped into spending loads on a new baby. Each of us obviously has a different life and what isn’t important to me might be for someone else, but the idea that our babies/children must have huge quantities of stuff is just not accurate.
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I agree heartily with your list, with one proviso: diapering in a cold house in the middle of a Maine winter is enough to make a mom consider a diaper warmer!
I’ve never had one and am a bit suspicious that a warm, damp environment might end up being a mildew farm, but after testing a cold wipe on my own skin one winter (YIKES!), I’ve started putting three or four wipes in a small bowl and microwaving them for about 5 seconds. It makes a huge difference, especially since we keep our house pretty cool.
So - I guess the microwave would be on my list of Must-Have Baby Gear?
Jenn in Maine’s last blog post…Here we are again.
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:18 pm
Ah - that’s true. I’ve diapered my kids in rather warm climates so far.
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My “babies” are almost 16 and 18 now. When they were babies our income was very limited. We decided that I should stay home with our children and that any monetary sacrifices made were well worth it. We never had any of the “fancy” equipment that so many new parents seem to “need” today. I had 1 umbrella stroller and a rocking chair. No changing table..we used the bed, the couch, a blanket on the floor….I didn’t buy a baby bathtub..one of us took a bath with baby and then handed wet baby off to the other parent. When we could afford it, I used disposable diapers, but I had a good stack of cloth diapers and rubber pants that were most sufficient. For the dirty disposables, I kept the plastic bags that we got from Wal Mart, the grocery store, etc…and put the “dirty” diapers in those, tied them up and put them in the trash. We just made sure the trash went out every day and never did we end up with a smelly house. I did use baby shampoo, generic, and baby soap and for the first six months I did use a baby laundry detergent. When our second child came along, our first was 23 months old and I did invest in a harness to keep up with baby #1 while baby #2 was in the stroller.
We are living proof that you can well take care of babies without all the “necessary” extras.
Deb’s last blog post…Happy Birthday Dear Hubby!!
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I have to add some love for the shopping cart cover, though I totally agree that it’s not something that’s necessary. But, where we live (outside the U.S.) the shopping carts are usually of the very wide variety and even after my daughter could sit very easily, she was still sort of lost in the huge open seat. Our shopping cart cover had straps that looped around the back of the seat and held her in place, and some little velcroed-on toys that she could play with. She loved sitting in the cart vs. being strapped to me the whole time in the carrier or sling and this made it easier.
Also, I have to share one thing I thought I would not need or want but ended up regretting not getting:
If I had it to do over, I *would* get the infant carseat that snaps in and out of a base. We live in a big city and mostly use public transportation, but we do lease a car and found ourselves driving a lot more during that first cold winter with a small baby. I thought I was being smart by getting a convertible carseat that our daughter could use from birth through toddlerhood. After many nights of taking her with us out to dinner or to friends’ houses in which she would fall asleep in the car, only to be rudely awakened upon arrival at our destination, I really regret not having a carseat that we could take inside and let her continue sleeping.
Cat’s last blog post…Twice the spice
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Lucie @ Unconventional Origins Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
The car seat that snaps out was 100% one of our best purchases. The first few months my son was born he hated his swing, his bouncer, his crib, EVERYTHING, but he was so happy to sit in his carseat, nap in his carseat, it was amazing. We called it his recliner!
Lucie @ Unconventional Origins’s last blog post…Inspired Projects - New Uses For Old Things
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:20 pm
I guess in response to both you and B - I never really thought of the shopping cart cover as something to contain a child. We’ve never owned one, so it’s something I hadn’t thought of. But that’s good to know, especially for people who have difficulty containing their child in a shopping cart.
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AgnesMinerva Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 5:43 am
Though it wasn’t a necessity for us, and I would never have bought one myself, I went ahead and threw the shopping cart cover my sister gave us in the trunk the first time I went shopping after my second was born. It was such a blessing - I had the baby in the sling, so that was no problem. But Big Sister, still a toddler and not yet ready to walk around outside the cart, absolutely refused to sit in the cart until I pulled out the nice, padded, colorful shopping cart cover (pockets stocked with lightweight books and snacks) and said, “Fancy seat?” She was a complete dream the entire time. Though the novelty has warn off in the last 1.5 years, I still use it for Little Brother, just because it looks so much more *comfortable* than all the wire and plastic he’d otherwise be sitting in.
AgnesMinerva’s last blog post…Heavenly Indeed
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Kelly from Almost Frugal Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 10:22 am
I use my sling as a shopping cart container, while the baby is still a bit to young to sit upright or to ‘tie’ in a curious baby. I have a simple, unpadded ring sling, so it works wonders.
Kelly from Almost Frugal’s last blog post…Got Five Minutes? Thirteen Five Minute Tools to Help You Save Money
We passed on virtually all of these as well, although a few things we were given as gifts.
We do use special lotion, body wash, and detergent because my son has pretty bad eczema (which is almost cleared up - yay!!!).
Another thing we didn’t need was formula, since I breastfeed. If this option works for you it saves so much money! We also asked for NO toys since we knew we would get some anyways.
To me the biggest waste of money is a changing table. Our whole apartment is a changing table - if we can lay a towel down, we can change the baby (although our bed has probably been where we change our son the most).
Simple mom - I would really like to see a post like this geared towards the first birthday. My son’s is coming up (as I assume is yours, my boy was born Dec. 21 2007 and I think your son was born very close to that date?). I do NOT want a bunch of toys for him so I am using wishpot to create a birthday and Christmas list for him. The only problem is, as a new parent, I am a little stumped as to what we should ask to have for ages 1 - 2.
Lucie @ Unconventional Origins’s last blog post…Inspired Projects - New Uses For Old Things
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Yes, the first birthday is tricky. We didn’t want more “stuff,” so on our daughter’s birthday party invite, we said that gifts were optional. Of course, most people brought gifts anyway. I know it’s just fun to buy gifts for little ones - there’s much stuff out there to choose from!
If I had to do it again, I’d really emphasize how we’d like to receive books - and possibly link to an online book list, like on Wishpot or Amazon. Reading and literature is really important to me, so if I had to have “too much” of something, it’d be books.
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I agree with all of your suggestions! I would also add the gazillion baby stimulating toys. Babies like faces and crinkled paper. No need to over-stimulate them. I would say my must have would be a simple sling (I make mine like the New Native brand using just a yard of looped fabric.). My other big must is a large receiving blanket. The possibilities for this are endless. Can use it to swaddle, a play mat, shade in the car seat or stroller (I’ve even rolled one up in the window on a long ride in a car without the shades), changing pad, “baggie” when you tie the four corners, nursing blanket, etc. Having my second being only ten weeks, I find I never leave home without these two very important items! My good friend even made me some out of one yard of fabric. If you sew two of them together, it’s a great warm, padded blanket as well. Another friend of mine is getting even further use by cutting up her old receiving blankets to make home-made baby wipes for her up and coming child.
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The crib and playpen my mother-in-law bought for us were the biggest waste of money. I knew in my heart that Violet would never sleep in them, but I felt like I would need a place to safely stash her when I couldn’t have her in my arms. It turns out that a second-hand bouncy seat was all I needed and all that Vi would tolerate. The crib was NEVER slept in. I now know that my daughter is very sophisticated and was simply insulted by being placed in jail!
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I agree with all the items on your list!
We also stayed away from collecting buckets and buckets of toys - toys that make noise, toys that move, toys that light up. We were given a few battery operated toys - but we found that they didn’t hold our children’s interest as long as the basket of blocks or the wooden train set.
So these days when I look for toys - our kids are 5, 4, and 3 - I look for things that require imagination and creativity as opposed to toys that are designed to simply entertain.
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Great post. The only one that I disagree with is the glider…. we’ve rocked our babies a lot, and I wouldn’t trade that thing for the world! It’s amazing…. super comfy and cozy (perfect for mommy to fall asleep rocking, too!)
Completely agree with you on the detergent issue. One additional comment on that: our son has severe eczema…. most people don’t realize that All/Purex/Cheer Free & Clear varieties have LESS perfumes than any baby detergent on the market. Our pediatrician and dermatologist both recommended them above baby detergents…. so we’ve always just washed all of our family’s clothes in that (and they are a WHOLE lot cheaper than baby detergents, too!)
Deanna’s last blog post…Just fun….
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Lucie @ Unconventional Origins Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 4:03 pm
Deanna - our son has really bad eczema too and we used a special detergent as well, but not the baby brand. I agree that a free and clear brand works best. When my son was born we bought a HUGE bottle of the Costco brand to use for the whole family and it is JUST now running out. I know that saved us a lot of money!
Lucie @ Unconventional Origins’s last blog post…Inspired Projects - New Uses For Old Things
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Tara Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 7:29 am
I’m right with you on most of the things you have listed except the detergent. Most household cleaners are so full of icky things that I don’t even use regular detergent for my clothes, nevermind the baby. Gadgets and gear aren’t a huge priority, but health and safety sure is!
Speaking of gadgets, I never understood the baby monitor thing. I was never enough far away from my baby to make having a baby monitor necessary.
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As a mom of 3 (ages 5, 3.5, 2) with another due in 2 weeks I’ve got lots of opinions about the stuff babies “have” to have these days. I totally agree with your list!
I will add that I bought a shopping cart cover not because of the germs but because my son outgrew the infant carrier before he could sit up in the seat and the safety strap in those things won’t keep a child upright. So I bought a cover with nice wide straps that held him in a sitting position.
stephaniesmommybrain’s last blog post…You don’t own a television?!
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I agree with the comment that these are personal decisions. If you are trying to be frugal, or simplify, then some of these are “unnecessary”. However, some are nice to have. We loved our wipe warmer for early morning changes especially. It didn’t take up much space at all. Multiple carseats and strollers are nice to keep in each car when one parent takes the child to caregiver and the other picks up. A shopping cart cover does more than protect the child from sticky dirt and germs. A full size highchair could help keep little hands away from hot plates, knives, and easily tipped adult size cups. We used the Diaper Dekor and never had an odor problem. So nice to have by the upstairs changing table. I could say the same for our Pack and Play, which doubled as a changer downstairs. Very convenient in those first few months. Many children have exzema and can not use “regular” detergent. I love the smell of baby Purex and use it on some of my own delicate clothing also. So, some of these “unnecessary” items add a lot to the quality of life for mom, dad, and baby.
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I agree with everything on the list EXCEPT having one stroller. I just LOVED my Baby Jogger for our long walks. We used it a tremendous amount, and admittedly it was a luxury, but it kept our sanity. It was important for us to still be able to do some of the things we always enjoyed liked walking (and the baby gets heavy in the front pack/back pack after a while).
Also loved the type of stroller that you can clip the baby seat into. That was awesome for the mall.
And when the baby was one and outgrew that type, then we went for an umbrella stroller.
But then sister came along, and we needed a double stroller for certain occasions.
Then big brother got to old to be in a stroller, so we were back to just the umbrella stroller for a while.
So over the course of babyhood you WILL need more than one stroller, but you some are luxuries and some are just trade ups.
Something that you might not think you need but you will: Baby Bjorn. Those things are great!
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:25 pm
Yes, I suppose some families will need more than one stroller. But we’ve always been fine with just one. We were recently given a very nice Peg Perego umbrella stroller, and we more or less use that exclusively. I’ve never had the snap in types or a jogging stroller. It probably depends a lot on a family’s lifestyle.
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Diaper Genie/Champ - it was useful for us because we don’t really have an outdoors area we can stash the dirty diapers. Not essential, but useful.
We also put a changing pad on top of the dresser, but I think this dresser was a great height for that pad and my wife & me.
I pretty much agree - none of these are essential/must have items. We didn’t have a rocker and got by okay. We had multiple strollers, but generally just used one. We had a full size high chair and it was useful to put the little ones in and sometimes let them nap, but we could have gotten by with something else. We used lotion when appropriate, but no other time. I think we were given a sample of Dreft, used it up, then just used our normal detergent at 1/2 strength or something. We didn’t have any sensitive babies in our care.
@Lucie - we started a “no presents” birthday policy for our daughter. For her first birthday we insisted that if people felt a need to bring something that they bring a box of cereal for the local food pantry. After the party, my daughter brought that cereal in. We’ve kept that going ever since. Family can give a small number of presents, but we try to limit that to a small amount and focus on giving to others. We still have a party and celebrate, but it’s nice not to focus on toys and such at the time.
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Lucie @ Unconventional Origins Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 4:00 pm
Peter - thanks for the idea, I think we will do something like this as well, I really want to incorporate the idea of giving to others on holidays and birthdays - I want this to be a tradition with my son so that he cannot imagine a holiday without giving to others. I think we will def have a no toy policy, and that we will ask family members who insist on getting us gifts for something practical, like clothes or gift certificates to the grocery store (I am AMAZED at how much my 9 month old eats now that he is onto table food!).
Lucie @ Unconventional Origins’s last blog post…Inspired Projects - New Uses For Old Things
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Totally agree with a lot of these. Though I did feel like kind of a bad mom for not getting the wipe warmer.
Angie (from over at http://www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Half Assed Kitchen’s last blog post…An easy-ass way to dress up your meat
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This is one of my favorite topics to share with parents-to-be! Thanks for a nice take on it. We often think of this subject as “mommy chatter,” but I’ve found dads-to-be really dread the gearing-up process and are especially relieved to talk with an experienced parent about lightening the consumer drag.
I’ve got a similar post of unnecessary baby gear at http://apconnect.org/2008/09/20/what-not-to-buy-for-a-new-baby/ — a little more of a focus on the smaller things than this one. Glad to see your list here at Simple Mom!
Lisa’s last blog post…Help your child’s teacher green the classroom
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My first daughter was exclusively clothed diapered and I invested a lot of money and energy into it. I adored cloth diapering.
After a nasty separation and upon my return to school and internships, my second daughter became disposable diapered. I planned on returning to cloth diapers, but after her wardrobe caught up with disposables (cloth diapers are much bulkier and clothes have to fit over them), I eventually retired the diapers.
With the cloth diapers, they went from the shelf to the diaper pail to the washing machine. With disposables, they go from the shelf to the ??? My daughter is 2 1/2 and I’ve yet to find a good system. I couldn’t be bothered with a “diaper genie”. I throw the wet diapers into the kitchen garbage, but the dirty diapers end up on the back porch to go into the big cans, so it’s a nasty sight. We used to use those plastic grocery bags, and I still do on occassion, but most stores here don’t distribute them anymore.
Anyway, it’s one aspect of diapering that I don’t have down pat! Thanks for your entry today!
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:27 pm
Sigh… I really would like to explore the cloth diaper world - I think I’d really take to it. I just don’t know where to start. I’ve got a good guest writer covering this very topic here soon.
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I agree whole heartedly. We have four children so far and with each one we have had fewer and fewer pieces. It just causes clutter. A boppy pillow and infant carseat would be the two things I would want if we were to get pregnant again. (I loved my swing but could always borrow it back again)
I wanted to say to all of you that have the excema issue. We had it too… our three year old had it really bad on his “knee pits”. (*I have never used baby laundry detergent because we do not sort our laundry, I just wash it, how ever it comes down the chute, I pick it up and toss it in). We switched to charlies soap (no detergent) and use 1/4 cup of white vinigar in the rinse. There is not scent and the clothes are just as clean as when I used any detergent. NO skin issues here what so ever. Just my 2cents.
anna’s last blog post…Our excellent adventure
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I just had a baby shower about 3 weeks ago and I agree with your list. We don’t have a large house and those things take upway too much room. We still have baby laundry detergent from whe my first, a 5 year old, was born.
However, baby lotion is a must because even I use it.
arah’s last blog post…when I was a kid…
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This is sooooo good. And reading through the comments it just goes to show that NEED can be very personal. We had to use a strong laundry det. b/c we had 5 babies who all spit up a lot. Nothing “gentle” would take the smell out. But someone who’s baby’s skin is really sensative couldn’t do that.
I have a bad back so a snuggly or a sling is out of the question if I am going to walk upright. But my oldest wasn’t walking when my 2nd came along so I had to have a double stroller if I wanted to leave the house by my self.
The one thing that we could not do without is a swing. They slept in it, they learn to eat in it, they play in it. But we never bought the one that goes 8 different directions or was like a cradle. Ours is the old style, it does use batteries, but it is more like a reclyning chair with a tray. We just move it from room to room and inside and outside and our babies all loved it. But there agian, it may be that some people get a swing and never use it.
The two things I will say is are a waste of money and space are a changing table and any kind of fancy diaper pail (and lets not forget all the refill bags you have to buy). Anywhere can be a changing table and a pail outside your door is a great way to dispose of any diaper.
Stephanie’s last blog post…What Happens to the Children
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Totally agree…the amount of products available for babies is mind-boggling. You buy all this stuff when you’re pregnant, and than before you realize it they aren’t babies any more and you’ve got a huge pile of stuff to deal with. Here’s my list of<a href=”http://www.growbabygreen.com/?p=29″ 10 products not to buy.
tara’s last blog post…“Natural” Baby Product Claims are Misleading Parents
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Oops. Here’s my list of 10 things not to buy.
tara’s last blog post…“Natural” Baby Product Claims are Misleading Parents
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I agree with multiple strollers, except that having a stroller for the carseat to attach to was awesome, especially in airports. But instead of a full-blown stroller, I would recommend a $50 stroller FRAME; much lighter, collapses completely flat, & can be used to cart any type of carseat around. Still has a basket, too. Once the child can sit properly in an umbrella stroller, then I would invest in a high-quality one.
Amen on the carseat cover - what a total waste of $20.
We invested heavily in a quality glider rocker & I’m so glad we did. My child nursed for HOURS on end & I was constantly thankful that I could sit in a comfortable chair - ours even reclined! However, the ottoman is completely unnecessary. You can use any kind of footstool for the time being & then the whole “system” doesn’t take up too much space once the long nursing days are done with. If we had a rocker, I probably wouldn’t have upgraded to a glider, but we had nothing at the time.
Baby powder, baby lotion & diaper cream - I would only get the travel size ones of those. I still have full-size bottles for my now 2.5 year old & I’m beginning to wonder if they ever go bad?? If you need more than 1 full-size tube of diaper cream for a child, then something’s WRONG.
Lastly, I don’t think you need the humongous, “convertible”-type cribs that change into a toddler bed. They look totally cute & all, but the kid really doesn’t last long in the toddler bed. I think it’s better to just go with a basic crib that fits the space properly, then invest in either a twin-size bed or a bed that has drawers underneath.
Great post!
Vicki’s last blog post…The wait is over
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Oh! I would also add CLOTHES. Especially clothing from 0-6 months. Unless you live in the Bahamas, your child will be wrapped up for the first 2-3 mths & nobody’s gonna be seeing all the cute little outfits they’re wearing. Plus, you’ll be given so many clothes, both new & hand-me-downs, that you’ll swear you need twins just to use them up for the next baby!
Vicki’s last blog post…The wait is over
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I found that w didn’t need nearly as much as all the stores wanted us to think we did. That said though, we still find it helpful to have several different strollers simply cause we us a double one for both kids and singles if they go anywhere by themselves, etc. We never did find the “big” stroller to be much help though cause it was hard to take places.
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The diaper pails all bother me. We are to the point where we only have “dirty” diapers twice a day and I just take them to the dumpster right away. I can’t stand having them in my house. I liked the shopping cart cover because my daughter always wanted to put her mouth on the handle of the shopping cart, and that seems a little disgusting. Now, that she’s two, I go without one.
teri’s last blog post…Go Pink in October - Robeez
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Two things that were not on your list that I loved: a car seat cover (if you have a newborn during the cold winter months) - it keeps the baby very warm and keeps any blankets inside the carseat/carrier, and a sling - great for nursing in public.
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Good ideas, Christy. I do have a things I do love and find useful in the works. I’ll get to posting it soon.
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love this… i remember when i registered with baby #1 and when i turned in my list they said are you sure you are done you only have 2 pages and most moms have at least 15! ridiculous what you convince yourself you need.
marla’s last blog post…wordless wednesday…
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I think after 3 kids, anything that is big and plastic is just totally something parents don’t need. Like the swings or exersaucers, bathtubs. As a new parent I always got the nesting bug and thought I needed these things. Then when I only used these things a couple of times, I felt the need to get rid of them because they were cluttering my house. These things are part of this consumer culture and it actually takes time and money away from the family: thinking about, purchasing and trying to get rid of them when they were unused and collecting dust. Also I want to mention that I use cloth diapers and I love them. I use fuzzibunz and they are so soft and they are easy to use AND I save so much money!
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simplemom Reply:
October 8th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
Well said - very true.
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Kelly from Almost Frugal Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 10:29 am
Oh, I loved my exersaucer! We’ve actually had three- one for each kid. You can only use them for about three to four months- from the time that the baby can hold it’s trunk upright, but can’t really sit on its own, to when they start crawling, but they were invaluable tools during that time for my kids. We bought each of our exersaucers used- for about €20- and sold them again for the same price. I LOVED them.
Kelly from Almost Frugal’s last blog post…Got Five Minutes? Thirteen Five Minute Tools to Help You Save Money
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Thanks a ton for the link to the “Simple yet Essential Baby Registry”! I’m expecting in January and just starting to think about what to put on my own baby registry. I’ve seen lots of articles about “what not to buy” but I can usually tell on my own what’s extraneous. It’s the questions of “what will I use on a daily basis?” and “will I overlook something important?” that really gets me, and the link was a huge help. Thanks!
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You are so right on! I am still amazed when shopping for a baby shower and find that the mom has listed so many items that are not necessary. Such a waste. Our moms and grandmoms did without and things worked out just fine!
patti’s last blog post…1908
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Stroller: True. A middle of the road Combi with removable tray served us well.
Shopping Cart Cover: True. Never had one. No real issues with germs here.
Baby Wipes Warmer: True. But, with winter babies, it did help to have warm wipes to let them stay drowsy if I was changing them in the middle of the night.
Full-Size High Chair: True. Never had one. Loved that I could strap in new walkers at dinner parties and picnics without spending extra money on a portable chair in addition to a full-size.
Diaper Pail: Yes. We keep our old pail (thrifty) on the deck, too. MUCH better outside than in.
Baby Detergent: Yes. I’m allergic to scents anyway.
Changing Table: Yes. Floor and a tea towel are sufficient. In fact, I keep my diapers and wipes in the entertainment center out in the main room. Lol.
Glider: Yes. I only had a glider with one baby. I just cuddled on the couch with my babies and they seemed quite satisfied.
Baby Lotion: Never used it. Too smelly. I get headaches from it, so I was sure baby would, too.
Great article. So true!
Deb’s last blog post…Tracing Our History
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One thing I learned when we had our son a little over a year ago is that in the frantic rush to make sure you “have everything”, keep in mind that Target is still going to be in business and open after your child is born. Walmart will still be there 24/7 if something comes up in the middle of the night that you aren’t prepared for.
So take a step back, relax, and don’t stress too much about getting everything in order beforehand. Besides, you’ll probably welcome an excuse to get out of the house when the time comes.
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This was great! I’m expecting my first next month, and I’ve been getting the feeling I don’t even need half the stuff people have been recommending. I think bottle warmers could probably be done away with too…
What you and your husband did with the dresser/changing table is exactly what my mom suggested. Why take up extra space and spend more money when you already have all you need? Great post!
Mrs. Priss’s last blog post…$100 for 100 Posts
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Great post and so timely for me. I am expecting my first child in February and had planned to go register for baby items tonight!
We have a small apartment, and so are very aware of space constraints. Plus, we’ve found that less stuff and less clutter in general makes a happier life for us.
On not buying a highchair:
I totally agree with your suggestion about the booster seat. I have heard nothing but good things about this Fisher Price Healthy Care Booster Seat . Just wanted to throw that out there for others who might be searching for a good alternative.
Also, I just want to mention that craigslist and freecycle are great resources for finding non-essential items (like gliders) and toys on the cheap or for free — and if it doesn’t work for your baby, you can cycle it out of your home via the same sites.
Marisa’s last blog post…hello, self.
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I agree with the original post and some of the things in the comments (I read about half). Except for the free-standing high chair. I bought one for my oldest that strapped to the seat and she hated it. She was never comfortable and always ended up in my lap–meaning I never ate and lost like 50lbs (blessing in disguise?). Someone gave me a big highchair she had used with her three kids. OMGoodness! The ease and comfort of that thing is marvelous. I’ve since thrown out the icky foam padding away and just use a folded up towel. I should add that we don’t have a traditional style dinner table. At home we have a booth with curved seats (think Subway) and where we are staying we don’t have anything at all. We just all kinda sit around in a circle. The big highchair has made all that sooo much easier. I have it on the lowest setting and my daughter (until it was taken over by my son) could climb in and out of it by herself. It doesn’t have wheels on the bottom.
Laundry detergent–even Dreft has perfumes! Yuck! We all have super-sensitive skin. I just used free and clear on all our clothes until about a year ago when I switched to Charlie’s Soap. I love Charlie!
As for regretted not/enjoyed having an infant bucket carrier—obviously you have never Moby-ed. My baby was in the Moby during everyvisit and most of his naps for the first 3 months! I love Moby–maybe even more than Charlie?
Strollers–we ended up needing 2. Our home is out in the country–gravel driveways. The zoo has gravel walk-ways. We got a big, full-air tired BabyJogger City. Then we temporarily relocated to a city environment with now 2 kids. I strap the little one to me, but the other toddler rides in a smaller, more airport and shop friendly, stroller. I like the City so much that I got the City-mini for the smaller stroller! Making a 2yo walk is not time or distance efficient. Now the almost 3yo is walking more and we sometimes put the almost 1yo in the stroller. You have to consider terrain when choosing a stroller–so you might need more than one if you are strolling in vastly different terrains.
Just some thoughts
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I don’t consider myself a germaphobe, but I loved the shopping cart cover. I think it makes those hard metal seats more comfy for baby too. And there have been studies done that say that the handles on shopping carts are some of the dirties places in the whole store… so I didn’t mind that it covered it for me too during flu season. BUT they are easy to make if you can sew or can get someone to make you one.
I agree with most of the other items though. I think it’s all so personal and with your first you don’t know what you are going to want/like/need. For example the swing was a lifesaver in our house, but two friends who had babies around the same time barely used theirs.
I say take a friend you trust who has had a baby within the past few years when you set up your registry. As long as the basics are covered: nourshment, diapers, a place to sleep, a car seat and a baby carrier of some sort, you are set.
Mama K’s last blog post…true confession
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100% agree with all of that except maybe 50% on the stroller issue. We had a travel system and LOVED it, but it was an awkward jogging stroller with a huge front wheel, so I ended up using a glorified umbrella stroller ($40 at thrift store) once he was a little older. BUT we lived way out in the country on gravel roads so we did need to keep the all-terrain jogger.
Shopping cart covers and baby wipe warmers are marketing gimmicks.
Full size highchair: I got rid of mine and if I have another baby I’ll just get the portable chair mount type. Way less room and easy to take along if you need to.
My Diaper Genie is gone, who really wants to keep all that nasty smelling stuff in the house anyway? Mine goes into a grocery bag and straight out to the trash in the garage!
Baby Detergent is not something I needed at all, but I know of kids susceptible to exzema… and they definitely needed it. But probably not necessary for 80% of babies out there!
Change table? Not a multitasking unit at all, and basically unusable after they’re trained. A low-ish dresser with a large top is a much better idea because you can use it until adulthood. My favorite is the Hemnes dresser from IKEA.
Never had a glider. When our first was born, dh and I bought each other a nice luxurious La-z-boy. We decided it was something we would both use for years, not just for the babies!
Baby lotion: I used it a little, but it’s more of a want-to, not a have-to!
Mikki Roo’s last blog post…computers and kids
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I agree with you that some of those things just aren’t necessary. Like baby detergent, wipes warmers, changing table and full size highchairs.
However, I found the shopping cart cover very useful. Not only does it protect against germs, but it also made the seat more comfortable for my DD. I also wasn’t worried about her getting her fingers stuck in parts of the cart. We used the cover for about a year, now my cousin is using it for her baby.
I also recommend more than 1 stroller. Babies under 6 months can’t sit in umbrella strollers. Plus, they are usually very cheaply made and don’t have storage space or cup holders. They didn’t have them when I had my DD, but I love the idea of the snap and go type strollers for infant seats. Then moving to a lightweight stroller.