Written by kids contributor Megan Tietz of Sorta Crunchy.
September brings a birthday celebration in our home. Our younger daughter turned two this month, so I have had birthday parties on my mind. As I purged the toys in our playroom before her birthday arrived, I thought about how quickly we accumulate stuff.
Thinking about all that stuff reminded me of The Story of Stuff, a short but powerful look at consumerism and consumption in Western culture.
At the close of this short film, the audience is challenged to consider doing things “another way”. I realized it was time for my family to have an alternative approach to birthday celebrations.
Here are nine ideas for “another way” to celebrate birthdays.
Invitations
1. Go handmade.
Rather than purchasing pre-made, impersonal party invitations by the pack, personalize the invite by sending invitations created by your child. Most families have some child-created art around the house—this is the perfect opportunity to repurpose it for new life. Drawings could be mod-podged onto cardstock and slipped into envelopes, or you could turn your children lose with some glitter, glue, and paper and let the festive muse inspire.
2. Go electronic.
Create and send online invitations via Evite. Of course, if you wanted to really go back-to-the basics, you could rely on good old-fashioned email to spread the word about your child’s party. This is a great waste-free alternative to the mailed invitation.
photo by D Sharon Pruitt
Activities
3. Give back.
Plan activities that will honor a person, group, business, or service that brings happiness to your child.
If your toddler delights in story time at the public library, have the guests create a giant card to say “thank you” to the librarians and library staff. If your preschooler is fascinated with fire trucks, invite party guests to make several batches of cookies or other sweet treats to deliver to the local fire department.
Be creative. This is a wonderful way to celebrate the little things that bring joy to your child without bringing more stuff into your home.
4. Bless others.
Pick a charity or relief organization focused on children, and at the party, create something to donate to your chosen organization.
For example, find a simple stuffed animal pattern before the party, and gather the materials needed for each guest to create one (repurpose material you already have around the house). Party guests can each create one of the stuffed animals.
While they create the animals, talk to the guests about the organization you and your children have chosen to bless.
Ideas for simple projects include these wee easy stuffed animals or one of these stuffed animal crafts.
5. Go simple.
Really simple! Don’t buy a single thing for any of the party’s activities. Encourage adults at the party to teach the guests some of their favorite and “vintage” party games. Turn everyone loose outside for freeze tag, or have the adults create a scavenger hunt. Challenge yourself to cut out any unnecessary stuff when it comes to party activities.
Food
photo by ilkerender
6. Celebrate local food.
Shop the farmers’ market, food co-ops, roadside stands, and local farms for fresh produce, and plan the party menu around whatever is in season. Sweet potatoes in season? Why not serve sweet potato pie? Summer birthdays can be celebrated with a blueberry cobbler made from blueberries gathered at the local U-Pick. Orange ginger cookies would be wonderful for a winter birthday.
This is a sweet and inviting way to advocate buying locally and eating seasonally.
Gifts
7. Ask for handmade well wishes.
If your focus is on less stuff, the issue of gifts will have to be addressed. To take a really bold action against consumption, you could ask guests to forgo traditional gifts.
Rather than showering the guest of honor with toys or clothes, ask each guest to bring a letter-sized paper filled with words and pictures that celebrate the birthday child. Collages, poems, songs, inside jokes, and favorite memories could fill pages that you could slip into a photo album after the party.
Rather than bringing in more “stuff” that will eventually be tossed or outgrown, your child would have a tangible reminder of his value and worth.
8. Ask for a gift to donate to charity.
When my friend Angela’s youngest daughter turned one, she asked guests to bring a donation to the local crisis pregnancy center in lieu of more toys for the birthday girl.
Consider the organizations that are in need of donations in your community, and invite party guests to partner with your family in meeting the needs of others.
9. Give gift ideas to the insistent.
Some guests will insist on bringing a gift for the Birthday Girl. If a friend or family member really wants to buy a present for the child, the most loving response is gracious acceptance.
When someone asks for gift suggestions, let them know you’re open to pre-loved toys or clothes from resale shops. Those who want to buy something brand new could be directed to local merchants and small businesses, or to online venues which feature handmade toys and clothes (such as Etsy or Hyena Cart.
In some social circles, birthday parties can turn into competitions of extravagance and—ultimately—waste. It takes courage and conviction to stand apart from the crowd and choose to celebrate another way. I can’t help but believe the alternative path here is one of deep satisfaction and meaningful reward.
What are your ideas for avoiding birthday party insanity? Do any of these suggestions sound extreme to you, or do you feel like a different type of party would be a welcome relief?
This post was first published on September 16, 2009.
About Megan
Our baby girl is turning 1 in November. She has a cousin whose 1st birthday is 2 weeks before. Since we share a lot of family and friends and their birthdays are so close together we are doing one party for both girls. This way we will save some money because we’ll be splitting the expenses. We are also planning to do a potluck (family members will be insisting on helping out anyway, so that sounds like a great way to get them involved).
I definitely love the evite idea instead of mailing invitations. I think that’s what we are going to do.
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Although I agree that many of us have way too much stuff, I am sorry to see you promoting this propaganda. The minute I start believing government is supposed to “watch out for us, to TAKE CARE of us” I’m in trouble. I believe in personal freedom and responsibility. I plan to research the statistics she quotes in the film. Anything backed by the Tides Foundation is questionable as they are trying to promote a very left wing agenda.
Good point, Cindy. Too bad there’s no ‘like’ button!
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good ideas! I hope your friend’s donations didn’t go to an anti-choice crisis pregnancy center.
For my children’s b-days I asked family for money so we can buy memberships to local museums and national parks. My kids have way too many toys. I want to give them experiences instead.
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There are really some useful tips on birthday ideas. I got such a nice information from this part of article. Thanks for sharing such type of great information.
On that same idea, I’m forgoing party favors. I will send each child w/ a bundle of balloons that were decorations for the party and have a little card attached explaining we are trying to teach our children it is better to give than receive and trying to avoid consumerism. As his party theme is construction, we will make a donation to Habitat for Humanity. I’m also asking guests not to bring gifts.
Please tell me if you think this is a BAD idea…
Love love the idea
I thought of this blog post that I’ve bookmarked. Even though it’s about Christmas gifts, there are good ideas on how to simplify and get rid of excess.
Great post! Very helpful.
At my daughters first birthday, we didn’t refuse gifts, but only invited family who mostly brought diapers, books, and keepsakes like an engraved baby hairbrush. We did however ask all guests to bring a note and item for a time capsule box for my daughter to open on her 16th birthday. It was a hit!
On her second we did an art theme and gave framed pics she painted as favors. We also hung a large piece of art paper and asked guests to draw their own picture of her aloud with writing a note.
For her third, she wanted things for the poorer family we had adopted for Christmas. We asked her little friends and family to each bring 3 items for the local food pantry (since she was 3) instead of gifts. We matched what they collected, so many brought extra.
This year we don’t know what we’ll do, but she was invited to bring 2 duplicate books to a friends party. One for the birthday child’s library, the other for the small schools library. Another friend asked for all gifts to be dog toys and treats for the humane society instead. I love this new trend and would love more ideas.
There are many bounce house providers out there. If you rent a bounce house, I recommend a company that participates in SIOTO (Safe Inflatable Operators Training organization) like http://jumptastics.com.
Thanks for your suggestions, I loved them. In fact, for some I see the use beyond parties for the kids. We have certainly had parties at our house where every couple brings wine, cake, etc. when we already stocked up on everything. Next time, we will be sure to let our guests know if they insist on bringing something, that they just donate to a charity. May as well help others when we can.
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The milestone birthdays are my favorite to plan
But at this age everything is a milestone to me. Our youngest son has a September Birthday also!
There is a company called Palmetto Parties Airbrush Tattoo. Its great fun for kids and adults! They have over 1,000 tatoos. You can get as many tatoos as you want! But they are located in SC. If you are interested, their number to call is: 803-403-9879. Their site is http://www.palmettoparties.com. And their email is: palmettoparties@gmail.com. The owner is Kristine Nelson.
great blog, so many fun ideas. thank you!
We do simple birthday parties at home – make our own invitations or use email. I make our cakes (cupcakes) and this year we combined birthdays (son – 4 and daughter 2) – birthdays 8 days apart). Same group of friends would come for both parties anyway since they have kids the same ages.
I do not agree with asking kids to give away their new gifts. People who come to the party or give gifts do that because they want to give the child something. To ask the child to give a new one away I feel is rude to the person who gave the gift (even if they don’t know). I have let our son know that the presents are because our friends and family wanted to give him something and then we get rid of some older toys. Presents are not the focus as we haven’t even opened the gifts from todays party (didn’t open with guests here). Had a craft activity for the kids and most just played with our toys. Our favors were homemade crayons the kids helped me make with a sheet of stickers (from some we already had) and a pack of cards – guests got to choose which cards they wanted (matching, crazy 8′s, etc.). Got cards and totes from dollar store (3 for $1) and we only needed 9 so that was only $6 total for the favors and that included my two kids getting a pack of cards which they love. They loved helping make the crayons and were so excited to tell their friends about the crayons.
I feel the people who try to outdo others for birthdays have other issues – the parties are for the kids and should be kid oriented. My son has said for two years he wanted his party at home when others have it at the neighborhood pool. We had simple food that I made (pigs in blanket, pretzels, fruit and veggie tray with dips). I also did a bell pepper appetizer with chicken for the adults.
Most important – have fun – it is memories you are making with your children.
i know the feeling , we have so much stuff its unbelievable help i cant breath hehe , anyway love the idea of playing vintage party games i can think of quite a few always loved parce the parcel
I have planned a number of birthday parties for the kids over the years but I never thought in terms of giving back to the community. Your ideas about libraries and fire department are wonderful and really worth effort.
I like the idea of “vintage” party games. Stuff that are old school to us, can be new and exciting to our kids! E.g., my kids and I normally take our van to and from school. But the other day, I picked up the kids in my husband’s old Honda. My daughter wanted to know how she could roll down the window, and I told her she had to turn the crank on the door. She thought it was so cool! LOL.
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My friend throws a fundraiser for their cancer relay at a local indoor play place. It’s usually held right around my son’s birthday. I just invite his friends for a play date and pay for their tickets. All the money goes to fight cancer. I don’t call it a birthday party – just a play date therefor people do not feel obligated to bring a gift.
I admire this concept and tips, you just made my day heavenly. I was so worried about my kids birthday party for my little budget and this is amazing I’m gonna print this list as a guide and hopefully it will be successful