The concept is simple: You have a jar, and you need to fill it with rocks of different sizes. The most logical way to make sure they all fit is to first place the big rocks in the jar, and gradually follow with smaller rocks, until you top off the jar with the pebbles and gravel.

Big rocks first.

This well-known illustration describes how we should prioritize our life’s obligations — take the time to make sure the “big rocks” are where they need to be, and everything else that needs to fit will fall into place.

Habit #3 of our current Book Club selection, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families, deals a bit with the concept of “big rocks first.” Like in our recent discussion of understanding the difference of the urgent and the important, focusing on the big rocks forces us to allot the right amount of time to the things that really matter, and to let those lesser matters wait their turn.

There was some great discussion on the Book Club forums last week. Here are some of your thoughts on what it looks like to put the big rocks first:
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This post was first published on January 13, 2009.

“Eat a live frog every morning, and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.” -Mark Twain

My husband is currently reading a classic business tome called Eat That Frog. The basic idea is that if you do the worst thing on your plate first thing in the morning, the rest of the day is a cake walk.

So if your least-favorite chore is the laundry, and it’s one of the items on your to-do list today, then tackle it first. That way, you can spend the rest of your day knowing you’ve done the most irritating task.

Sure, there might be some more annoyances or tediousness – the dishes, the cooking, the helping with the homework – but in knowing you’ve accomplished the laundry, you’ve got fuel and motivation to do the less painful items.

I’m working on this in my own life right now. It’s an obvious concept, but it’s rather new to me – so I’m experimenting as I write this.

For me, my frog right now it’s not a chore – it’s simply working out. I love the after-effects of working out, and I even love the adrenaline rush and the glow of sweat once I get started. But that one hump – the actual starting it – is something I simply dread. I’m not sure why.

So I’m doing my best to tackle my frog-eating — the worst task of my day — first thing in the morning. And right now, it’s exercise.

What Not To Do First

It stands to reason that if you should do your least-favorite task first, that means you should avoid doing your most favorite task – or at least your easiest task – first.

We’ve all had those mornings where we start with great intentions of cleaning the house, running errands, balancing our checkbooks, or menu planning – but then we first check our email or see what Al Roker’s up to. Two hours later, and your enthusiasm is gone, along with valuable time you could have used getting stuff done. Somehow, this sets a tone for the rest of the day, and we approach our tasks reluctantly, with a poor attitude, or simply with less passion.

Photo by kbcanon

What To Do Instead

1. First, create something that outlines your tasks for the day.

You can use the Daily Docket, or you can use the back of an old receipt. Whatever works for you, just do something. Fill out a detailed to-do list for your day.

2. Narrow down your list to ten items.

You shouldn’t reasonably expect to do more – though if you find yourself having done ten things, you can simply add more items. By starting with a ten-item checklist, you’re not as daunted, and you feel more accomplished to get seven whole things crossed off in one day. Seven out of ten is more impressive than seven out of 34.

3. Out of those ten things, pick three Most Important Tasks (MITs).

These are the things you really need to do today; those tasks of which accomplishing them means a successful day. Write those separately up top.

4. Out of those three things, pick the worst one.

Do that task first. Make that your frog.

5. Out of your list of ten, pick your favorite or easiest item.

For me, it’s usually checking my email (it’s not my easiest, since I get tons of email, but it’s certainly a task I usually enjoy). Whatever you do, make sure you don’t do that task first. In fact, if you’re daring, don’t do that task until you get all three MITs done. Make doing that task your reward.

So I’m doing this as I go – and so far, it’s working. In fact, I’m slowly starting to enjoy working out more. I’m not sure it’ll ever be my favorite task, but perhaps I’ll eventually go back to starting my day with the dishes.

What’s usually your least-favorite task? Your favorite? How have you experienced the frog-eating theory in your own life?

Many of you have shared with me your positive experiences in regularly using the Daily Docket, and I’m so thankful for your encouraging feedback. For those of you who are newer readers — feel free to first download the Docket and see what you think.

There’s a lot of info on the internet about scheduling your day as a stay-at-home mom, and I’ve tried to apply a lot of these different tactics. They never worked for me. They were too rigid — a system would encourage me to write out a specific timetable for my day, and rotate weekly jobs set in stone on different days of the week. By writing this schedule out and hanging it visibly, I’d know what to do next.

It’s a great idea, but my life’s a lot more… unpredictable. When I tried to make Thursdays my Laundry Day, or One-On-One Time With My Daughter at 11 o’clock Monday through Friday, I was trapped.

I was trapped because life happened — one week I’d have an abnormally large amount of laundry, so by trying to do it all in one day, I set myself up for failure because I just couldn’t do it all. Time with my daughter would get pushed back because we really needed to run errands at 11 a.m., or she needed an earlier nap and 11 just wouldn’t do.

I wanted to throw any semblance of routine out the window. But I really didn’t want to do that, because a routine helps me. I love checking things off a list. I’m visual, so it helps to see my day’s plan.

What has evolved as my Daily Docket is a marriage of scheduled routine and flexibility.It provides the skeleton for me to hang my agenda, but it allows for wiggle room because I fill out a new sheet each day.

Instead of a set routine for Mondays, I fill out a fresh sheet for that very day, using a Weekly Checklist as my resource (also found on the downloads page). My week’s goal is to get everything done I need to do by that week, but I’m flexible as to when specifically I should do it..

Let me show you how this works.

The night before, I take one of these and fill it out for the next day. It helps if I fill it out in pencil because things are so unpredictable in our home that I have to be flexible.

The smaller categories on the page are as follows:

• My MITs – The three most important things on my agenda today.
• Current Scripture I’m working on memorizing/meditating over.
• What’s for Dinner? – When I write it down, I remember way in advance what the dinner plans are, and what I need to do in advance for preparation, so I’m not scrambling at 5:45.
• Health stuff – I’m trying to log my water and my food choices, so I like checking off that I’ve done that. And by writing down my work out plans, I’m more apt to do it.
• Blog and/or Graphic Design stuff – To-do items for my blogs and my graphic design business.

The bigger items are my day’s to-do list and my day’s general plan.

Photo by Jessica F.

My to-do list:  it’s short.

I limit myself to 10 things, because I know I realistically can’t get more than that checked off. I’ve actually almost never gotten all 10 accomplished in one day. By keeping it short, I’m making success – finishing my list – more of a reality. If I remember additional things throughout the day, I jot them down in my notes section, possibly for tomorrow’s list. I like Jamie’s idea of sticking with six items.

My day’s general plan:  it’s general.

General is the key word here.  The Docket looks a lot more structured than it is, but I don’t write out every last thing I have to do that day. I only assign a time and slot to those things I want to get done at a time of day. I want to get computer work during my kid’s nap time, so I remind myself that it’s a 2 o’clock job. I want to get breakfast on the table by 8, so I make a note of that. And most importantly for me, I want to get to bed by 10:30. Seeing it on paper reminds me that it’s important.

Here’s an example of what a Daily Docket looks like filled out (click to enlarge it):

Application Time

Feel free to download this Daily Docket (or the smaller one) for free. But you don’t have to use this — use what works for you. The point is to have a plan for your day, and to approach it proactively.

Whatever you use, keep it simple, easy-to-read, very easily accessible throughout your day, and thorough enough to manage your whole day on one sheet.

What do you use to get you focused on the day? If you use the Docket, do you have any suggestions or feedback? I know several of you have asked for an even smaller one than the Pocket Docket… I might get to that. Someday.

The following is a guest post from Angie of The Creative Mama and of Angie Warren Photography.

Pictures are souvenirs.

They are gifts to which we hold tight for years. Oftentimes, images of our childhood are the only tangible treasures we have to remind us of that fleeting time. To me, the photographs of my family are priceless and shall remain my most treasured recollections of these times in our lives.

1. Lighting

I’m a huge fan of natural light. There is nothing more perfect than the gorgeous glow that comes from a bright open window or the way your child’s face radiates with the sun setting behind her.

Good light is one of the greatest ways to enhance your photos. I used to think the brightest, sunniest days were the best for pictures. On the contrary — bright noonday light is nice for visits to the park, but use it with caution with photos. The harsh effects of the sun show up as dark shadows covering the faces of your loved ones.

Sometimes, the placement of the sun is out of your control. In these situations, do your best to put the sun behind your subject. Besides, we could all do with a few less squinty-eyed images every now and again, wouldn’t you agree? Instead, search out open shaded areas, where you still have light, just not direct light.

My absolute favorite time of day to shoot is early morning and late afternoon; the lighting is wonderful as the sun is near your side or behind you, as opposed to right above you. Go against the grain, and head out on a cloudy day or near sunset! You’ll be pleasantly surprised by the difference this creates.

2. Location

I would venture to say that the majority of your family pictures are taken in or around your home. I love this! After all, your son’s room won’t always be adorned with infant furniture and your daughter most likely will fall out of love with her Hannah Montana posters. Embrace the stages your kids are at and as always, be sure to include these items and details in your photos.

While I love to capture my own boys in their element, it’s also fun to get out. Thinking outside the box with location can produce some fabulous, and genuine portraits. When deciding where to head out, I ask myself — where would they enjoy being?

Although I may want snow pictures, I have to keep in mind that my finicky four-year-old isn’t a fan of the elements of Old Man Winter. Unfortunately, everyone would end up feeling stressed out and our photos would suffer.

Instead, I’ll usually ask him where he’d like to go. I camouflage a fun day at the zoo with a secret mission: mom taking photos. Sometimes we’ll take a surprise trip somewhere I know he’d enjoy. Many of my all time favorite images display exactly that on his face, simply because he was having a great time where we were.

3. Change Your Perspective

So often the photos of our children and pets are shot from where we stand, which is usually at a much higher level. The pictures all begin to look the same — wide shot with child or pet at the very bottom of the photo.

Instead, get down there with them. Lay on the floor in front of your crawling baby, or sit down for the tea party with your little girl. Step back for the wide shot, but also be sure to get in close. Zoom in on the details — the chubby hands and details of your pups’ face. Seeing the images from their level takes on a completely new view.

4. Capture Your Subject

As a lifestyle photographer, my aim is to capture life as it happens. I’ll not soon forget the stress of the portrait studios growing up, and this was a big part of my urge to take the picture taking into my own hands.

This photo-journalistic style bleeds into my own family’s image as well. Some of my most cherished pictures of my now four-year-old are the ones that weren’t posed, the candid and treasured ones. I see him as a two-year-old carrying his bucket of matchbox cars everywhere we went while the following year he sported various fake tattoos on a daily basis.

These are pictures that make me giggle and in an instant, I am right back there helping him carry that heavy bucket from place to place. When you allow your children to have fun in the moment, doing something they enjoy, you will then have genuine and natural images to hold dear.

Keep in mind, life happens every day. Rain or shine, tears or smiles. Your aim is to capture your family in real life terms. Not every day is beautifully sunny or full of laughter. That’s the beauty in it! Freeze time as you see it – scraped up knees and broken hearts.

5. Fleeting Moments

The detailed shots have to be my all time favorite. My baby’s eyelashes, the way my husband’s wedding ring slides down his finger, or the tongue hanging out of our dog’s mouth as he sleeps. Think about the details in your every day life — are you capturing them?

Even in the simplest of moments, pull the camera out — during the early morning feedings, in the middle of homework time, even as they are getting ready to go out with friends. Capture those wrinkly post-bath toes, be sure to take pictures of her reading her favorite book, and by all means, snap that shutter when they are sleeping.

At the end of the day, as long as you drool over your pictures, that is what truly matters. Browse through the folders on your computer, let your fingers trace the image framed on your mantel, or flip dreamily through the photo book you had printed. Allow that big smile to spread across your face!

LOVE what you are capturing, and not only will it show in your photos, but you’ll realize that no matter how many rules you follow or break -– you’re giving future generations a gift that is truly priceless. So get out there and snap that shutter.

Your moments are waiting to be captured.

What is one of your favorite photographs in your family?

I am an expert time waster. It’s actually a gift. You give me a block of time, even an entire day, and I can accomplish next to nothing through all of it.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ll look busy. I’ll sit at the computer and keep typing. I’ll keep moving about the house as if there are several projects I’m working on at once. But it’s all an act. A show, if you will.

Perhaps I should take it on the road. Charge admission. Put on several shows a week. Nah, that sounds like too much work.

You’re probably reading this wondering, where exactly does this gift come from because I think I’ve got it, too? In fact, you may think you are even more an expert at this gift than me.  I’d challenge you to a time-wasting duel, but that would be a colossal waste of time.

Time.

An interesting idea.

Where exactly did the idea come from? And how did it rise to such importance in our life?

Think about it. How much of life is centered around time?

Alarm clocks start us off each day. Schedules dictate how quickly we must leave the house, or when our kids need to move to the next project. We go through the day from one appointment to the next. Checking things off along the way.

We eat according to time. Travel according to time. Sleep according to time. Raise kids according to time. It’s everywhere.

Take a moment and look around you, how many things that tell time do you see?  Two, three, more?

Time runs our life.

When asked what you would like more of, you’d probably answer time. Many couples have expressed that one area they would like to improve is quality time in their relationship.

Have you ever spent a week or more away from the tyranny of time?

Where schedules and meals were determined by the sun and your body’s natural rhythms? This often happens while on vacation.

That’s one of the main reasons I love backpacking. You head off into the woods for several days with no time constraints. Life becomes slower. The body’s natural rhythms take over. The important things in life come to the surface.

What if you could live this way every day?

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