There’s a lot of fun stuff to do throughout the Christmas season, and if you’re like me, you have grand ambitions post-Thanksgiving that fizzle to survival by the 23rd. December dawn, and it feels like you’ve got all kinds of time to do all the things on your list. One fun thing per day. What’s hard about that?

Well, grocery shopping, for starters. And school, and work, and laundry, and errands. You know… the liturgy of life.

It’s frustrating to want to do festive things and to ultimately not do them.

Last week’s task was to plan your gift giving. This week’s Plan your holiday calendar, well in advance. Life gets busy, and it’ll be hard to get your fun things on the schedule if you don’t plan ahead.

1. Talk now.

Plan your calendar well in advance; start talking now. You don’t have to stress about it… Just discuss your Christmas priorities with your spouse after the kids are in bed, a bit at a time. Throw out any and all ideas—the sky’s the limit. Going to the actual North Pole? Sure, why not? At least for now.

Unless they’re teeny-tiny, ask the kids what they’d like to do during the holidays. Make sure you don’t accidentally promise anything. Choose words well.

2. Prioritize your ideas.

Alright, now make a list of those things, and mark the most important. Perhaps each family member can choose their number one item (now might be a good time to cross off the North Pole). You could also make an A, B, and C list—the must do, the maybe if we have time, and the not likely but it sure would be fun.

Photo by Pipnstuff

3. Dig up your calendar.

Look at the next few weeks, and give yourself a kind reality check. Including all your “regular life” stuff, how many holiday events can you actually do? Probably not as many as you’d like.

Jot down the set-in-stone events. School programs, Christmas Eve at the in-laws, office parties, anything not instigated by you yet necessary for you to attend, put it on the family calendar.

Don’t fill in the days with everything else yet.

4. Check the budget.

Go back to your holiday budget. What’s allotted for fun? Scrooge McDuck aside, most of us don’t have money to do everything. You might need to choose just one cash-heavy event, and save the others for future Christmases.

5. Now fill in your calendar.

Once you’ve settled on the money, plan the events. Buy those Rockettes tickets and scratch it on the calendar. Talk with your friends and finalize the cookie swap date.

As a couple, agree on how many nights out of the house rest on the right side of sanity. It’s different for everyone, so cater to the spouse most in need of home time. Kyle doesn’t like to be out of the house more than three nights a week, so we do our best to protect that.

6. Make the calendar fun.

Crazy as it sounds, but you may want to schedule smaller things, like movie or game nights at home. Time will fly by, and you’ll realize on Christmas Eve that you unintentionally skipped those little things that mean so much.

Enjoy the season! Make a point to spend an afternoon crafting a gingerbread house, or make popcorn garland while you watch Elf. Don’t’ stress over it, of course, but don’t just wish for more time to do those things. Make time for them. (If you can’t tell, I’m totally talking to myself here.)

Photo by Shim & Sons

Make these small holiday traditions more “official” by creating an advent wreath—count down to Christmas with one activity per day. It doesn’t have to be fancy. There are tons of ideas on Pinterest, from fabric to magnetic to paper. I love Mandi Ehman’s idea for an advent chain—tear off one chain per day, minimal calendar crafting required.

And while you’re nailing down your calendar, don’t forget to plan for the traditions that matter most to you. Every Thanksgiving I realize I still haven’t made the Jesse Tree ornaments I really want, so I settle for printed pictures the kids color minutes before they’re hung on the tree. It’s fine—but this year, I’d like to finally create some more permanent ornaments.

Holiday activities are meant to be fun—so let’s keep them fun. Don’t stress about doing everything—but make a point to do the things you really want to do, instead of just wishing they’d happen. Planning in advance will make the season more relaxing.

What’s one thing you’re going to add to your holiday calendar this year?

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• Plan Your Peaceful Christmas: Task 2
• 7 Weeks Till Christmas: Organize Your Family’s Holiday Calendar
• Plan for the Holidays: 12 Weeks To an Enjoyable Christmas

How many items do you have on your to-do list? How about goals? Do you have more than a few that you’d like to achieve? If you’re looking to simplify your life, likely that’s because your list is filled to the brim with goals, interests, activities, passions, people, and work.

It gets especially sticky taking action and completing anything on your master project list after you become a parent.

Since my daughter was born almost four years ago, I’ve had to adjust and reframe how I reach and set big goals in my life. It used to be so easy! But now, with a toddler in tow, a job managing someone else’s online business, a husband who needs my attention, too, writing for my own blog, writing my first book, and the myriad mommy duties, I need time and space to actually reach all those goals—and finish anything.

If your life is bursting at the seams, like mine, then you might like to know these three things I’ve learned to make space in your life, so you can actually get down to the business of getting things done.

1. You’re not lazy. You just need space.

If you’re anything like me, you’ve got lots of things you want to do. But life also happens, work tires you out, you just want lean back, take a break… and do nothing. Then what happens? You’re at the end of your week or weekend, and you regret not doing what you wanted to do.

Laziness isn’t your problem—setting priorities is.

Ask yourself if you’ve been putting something off because, as you say, you may actually be lazy. Then, decide if the issue is whether it’s actually a priority. You’ll feel empowered when you actually say it out loud. Either it is a priority, or it isn’t. You decide. Once you make this decision, you’ll feel a burst of energy.

2. Make some space to get some space.

I know, this kind of sounds like the chicken and the egg scenario, but hear me out. If you need space in one area of your life, look for easy ways to clear the clutter in another area.

Recently, someone close to me expressed her emotional stress over a relationship. She then spent the weekend cleaning out the closets in her house. By the end of the weekend, she could see the relationship more clearly, and her initial stress dissipated.

Since the closets posed no emotional stress to her, she was able to work on that space, and in some odd way, it cleared just that bit of mental room to re-evaluate what was going on in her relationship.

Do you have an area of your life that’s overwhelming you? Turn your attention to an area that doesn’t completely stress you out—and clean it up. Focusing on an area that gives you no stress, no worry, and no emotional overwhelm is often a secret back door to clearing the extra room in your life you need.

Try it. Is your body or weight making you depressed and obsessed with the scale? Spend the weekend cleaning up your receipts and paperwork, or fill your weekend with activities for you and your family. Money stressing you out? Go for a long run or hike.

3. Lose the Cs.

Photo by Koalazy Monkey

Create a master project list—dump everything from your brain onto a piece of paper. Mark the most important items with an A, the you-want-to-do-them-but-not-now with a B, and the ones you’ve been holding onto but really don’t need to do at all with C.

Cross off the Cs. Find a way to completely lose them from your list.

Even if you are never planning to do them, letting them sit on your list is weighing you down and taking up space. Just cross them off.

When you intentionally make more white space in your life, you’ll notice more mental clarity, more energy, and an increased sense of well-being.

Note from Tsh: Anne wants to give ten Simple Mom readers a copy of her new e-book, The White Space Solution! To enter the giveaway, simply leave any comment on this post. The giveaway will end Tuesday evening (tomorrow), October 25. I hope you win!

This giveaway is now closed. Check back soon for the winners!

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• Do you need white space?
• Lazy Saturdays with Dutch Babies
• Weekend Links

When I first read about Tsh’s new ebook, I immediately purchased it. What a fabulous idea, right? And oh so clever. The elephant analogy? Love it.

I realize there are thousands of “Simplify Your Life” books out there, but what I love about One Bite at a Time is that it’s broken down into simple, manageable chunks that I can actually incorporate into my day. Oftentimes, the Simplify books just end of up overwhelming me with yet more things for me to deal with…and all kinds of things I need to go out and buy.

You can’t be organized unless you buy 24 of these $10 containers.

You can’t simplify until you stock up on 16 of these racks and gadgets.

These $12 jars will make your life complete! You just need 35 of them.

Buy, buy, buy.

Yuck.

Granted, sometimes buying into a system that helps you stay organized is a must, but too often I find that Simplify books just end up being a long list of to-dos and to-buys.

Which is anything but simple, and the last thing I need. I had three kids in two years. I have enough on my plate thankyouverymuch.

But, if you’re anything like me, you skimmed, jumped, and flew through Tsh’s ebook in a flash. Great stuff, all of it. Yes, so simple! What a great idea! Hey, I’m doing that one already! Awesome!

And then I set the book back down and walked away. Thinking I’ll just magically incorporate the lessons into my life. Because that’s how things happen, right?

Right.

The brilliance of breaking up the overwhelming and ever ethereal task of Simplifying is that it makes it manageable… But to really get the full effect, you have to intentionally and systematically implement it.

You know, the way Tsh says you should do it right in the Introduction. Fancy that.

I decided that there had to be other people out there like me. You know, the ones with good intentions and all the tools at their fingertips, but not quite the system in place to stay on track?

So I started blogging my progress through the projects. One at a time. In order. Bite after Bite. I report back how I did that week, if I had challenges, and if I think I’ll realistically keep it up. I’m calling it One Bite at a Time: Together.

Encourage one another, share advice, what worked, what didn’t… Laugh at our failures. Celebrate when we find a project that worked for us. Shrug our shoulders when a project wasn’t what we had hoped it would be.

I started out blogging my progress weekly…but I think I’m going to switch it up and start doing it monthly. That way, if I have an especially harried week, and didn’t get to really doing what I was supposed to because kids were sick, camping trips were to be had, or trips to the Emergency Room were made, I can give myself some grace and make up for it the following week. (For the record, all three of those things happened in the last 7 days.)

After all, this is life. You know, the one I’m trying to simplify. It’s not always pretty.

Would you like to play along? We’re only through Week 3 so you can jump right in without being too far behind. I’d love to hear your thoughts as we move through the proverbial elephant!

If you haven’t already, buy One Bite at a Time and get started! I’m excited to meet you!

Think accountability would make simplifying your life a little easier? Maybe more fun?

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• One Bite at a Time: Together
• One Bite at a Time
• One bite at a time… together

Ever wake up and ask yourself, “How did I get here?”

Whether it’s an untidy house, a jumbled bank account, or an overpacked schedule, I’m stuck in chaos on more than one occasion. It may be because I am bursting with creativity or actively working on a project. Or I might be in such a fog of busy-ness, I can’t see clearly.

As moms we’re responsible for the welfare of others as well as ourselves. That’s the nature of the job. While we can’t do everything perfectly—nor should we try—it’s in our and our family’s best interests to put a little order into the chaos.

This is where paper comes to my rescue. Not only does writing things down help me make sense of my thoughts, it also helps me organize my life and my household. And I do it with my handy dandy notebook.

Tsh wrote years ago that her household notebook was her brain. I completely agree. I have so many thoughts floating in my head, I have to capture them somewhere, put them in order, and create a plan to give feet to my ideas.

A household notebook or personal planner is a great tool to help you manage your home and family responsibilities and to capture those elusive thoughts.

Where to start?

You don’t need to have a complicated planner system. When I was a tween, DayRunner came out with their inaugural planners. My mom and all her friends were smitten, but it seemed you had to take a class to figure out how to make it work for you. They would get together over coffee to try to make sense of all these papers and lists.

No, no, no. Let’s keep things simple.

1. Include some basic lists and records in your household notebook:

• a calendar
• a to-do list, like Tsh’s Daily Docket
• an address book
• the lists you find yourself creating over and over again, like a meal plan, a grocery list, or a checklist for road trips.
• 

2. Tweak it to fit your needs.

We each have different needs, desires, and quirks when it comes to a personal planner or household notebook. I like to have separate binders for my homeschool records and for our financial records. My homeschool binder stays in our schoolroom because that’s where I use it. Our accounting book stays in the office where I pay the bills.

But, my personal/household notebook—my brain—goes with my everywhere. It’s lightweight and easily portable, and includes the things that I need throughout the day, like my meal plan, my calendar, my idea file, my shopping lists, my writing and blogging files, and my overarching goals for life. I even laminated some of the pages to save paper and to give me a fresh start on my daily to-do list.

Customize your book to fit who you are and what you need on a daily basis.

3. Bind it.

Many folks like to put their planning pages in a three-ring binder. I tried this for years, to no avail. I gave it up after a few months of lugging around an unwieldy book. A few years ago, I tried a new tactic and had mine spiral bound. Now, I take my notebook everywhere with me—and it serves me well, instead of taking up space in a cupboard.

Choose the packaging system that works for you and then put together a planner that rocks. Add color and fun accents to make it suit your personality.

4. Use it or lose it.

You’ve heard it before—“Have nothing in your home that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful.” Make your household notebook work for you! Make it fit you and your life and your sense of style.

Last year I wrote an e-book that explains in more detail how to put together a household notebook, and how to maximize its potential to help you get your act together. The e-book is chock full of planning pages and inspiration for organizing your day, your home, your life. (And if you’re a homeschooler or a blogger, I’ve got those details covered, too.)

The most important thing to understand about a personal planner or household notebook is that it’s there to make your life easier, to help you keep track of your responsibilities and to free you up to do the things that matter most in your life.

Life is too short to spend it a day late and a dollar short. Make the most of your days and capture those elusive thoughts in a household notebook.

What’s your organizational system for keeping track of things?

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• Making a Household Notebook Work for You
• Summer Week of Giveaways: List Plan It
• Asking the Readers: What’s Your Dream Productivity Tool?

If you’re so inclined, and if you like the book, it’d mean so much to me if you would leave a review on Amazon. This is a small but powerful way you can support the e-book, this blog, and the entire Simple Living Media family. (I hate to ask, believe me.)

Oh, and we’re still working on the Nook version, and hope to have that ready for you in the next week or two.

Thanks for your patience, and happy reading!

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• One Bite at a Time: now on Kindle!
• Weekend Links
• Reminder: the Book Club starts in One Week!

Note from Tsh: I smiled when I first read today’s guest writer Laura Laing’s book title: Math for Grownups. If anyone needs Basic Math 101, it’s me (just ask my parents). So when Laura asked if I’d like to check out her book, I jumped at the chance. And I’m so glad I did! Now, Simple Mom readers have a chance to win a copy as well. Read on…

You’ve probably figured out by now that math in your everyday life isn’t much like the worksheets and timed drills you suffered through in elementary and middle school. And in the real world, you can leave those way, way behind.

That’s because grownup math has more to do with problem solving than remembering that 7 times 8 is 56. Most of us don’t use trigonometry or calculus. But basic math skills figure into some of the most critical decisions of each day—how to save money, save time and save your sanity. These days, you need to know how much top soil to order for your flower bed or what time your parents will arrive in Boston, if they’re driving in from St. Louis.

Four summers ago, I decided to build a deck—something I’d never done before. This process taught me a lot about the math I already knew and how to fill in the gaps with some pretty simple problem solving skills.

Tackle your fear

Don’t let these problems throw you completely. If the math freaks you out, deal with those feelings first.

Building a deck was an overwhelming proposition for me, and not only because I’d be using power tools. The materials were expensive. (What if I ordered too much or too little?) The project required skills I didn’t have. (What if I had to mix concrete?)  And I was going to have to deal with tiny details that can make me crazy. (What if the deck turned out six inches too tall on one side?)

Photo by Laura Laing

And then I asked myself a basic question: How hard could it be?  I’m as smart as the average construction worker. Besides, how great would I feel drinking my coffee out there in the morning? (Answer: pretty darned great.)

Figure out what you know

It’s easy to focus on your shortcomings, but good problem solvers almost always start with what they already know. Take my deck. I knew how big I wanted it to be and that I didn’t want any railings. I also knew that it would be situated over an existing concrete pad. I knew that I needed a set of steps and that it would be attached to the side of my house. I knew how to use a circular saw and swing a hammer.

Brainstorming these little details not only boosts your confidence, but also highlights what you need to find out.

Research what you don’t know

With my deck, I felt pretty confident that I could manage the posts and decking. But the stairs were pretty darned scary. So, I watched online videos and read articles. I trolled through DIY forums for been-there-done-that advice. Basically, I gathered information.

These days, the Internet makes it relatively easy to learn something new. Don’t remember the formula for the area of a triangle?  Look it up. Want to know how many tablespoons are in a cup? Open up a browser. There’s no need to remember everything you were supposed to learn in school. Not with the world wide web at your fingertips.

Get it down on paper

This is my favorite piece of problem-solving advice. Whether you’re figuring out how much you’ll save with your weekly stash of grocery coupons or you’re hanging pictures in your hallway, writing and drawing can be a huge help. And you don’t have to get fancy.

I drew my deck designs on the back of a school flier that my kid brought home that spring. I didn’t use a ruler, and nothing was drawn to scale. By the end of the project, the paper had been folded and refolded so many times, I could see light through the creases. This drawing was for my benefit, so no one else needed to understand it.

Check before you do

Unfortunately, the most important thing (besides confidence) that was probably drilled out of us in our math classes was the ability to spot an unreasonable answer. When the goals are speed and memorization, there’s no time for that kind of self-evaluation. But as a grownup, you can and should take this step.

Each time I measured a board to cut for my deck, I stepped back and took a look. Did it look too long or too short? Then I measured again. And took another look.

When doubling a recipe, make sure the altered measurements make sense. When balancing your checkbook, look through the amounts to be sure that they’re reasonable. You might be surprised by the little mistakes that you find, mistakes that could lead to bigger problems.

Each day, we’re faced with problems. And if you’re like most folks, the ones involving math are often the most daunting. But as grownups, we have more freedom to break the rules and get help. Having a few go-to problem-solving techniques can get you to a solution quicker and more confidently. And who couldn’t use a little more time and confidence?

Giveaway time!

10 Simple Mom readers will win a copy of Laura’s new book, Math for Grownups! To enter, simply leave a comment on this post, answering this question: “Growing up, what was your favorite subject in school?” (If you’re reading this via email, you must click over to the post to leave a comment.)

This giveaway will end Saturday, September 10 at 11:59 pm PST (that’s tomorrow). I hope you win!

The winners are: Shannon, Theresa, Angela, Emily, Julie, Gretchen, Lawana, Catie, Fiona, and Bree. You’ll be notified shortly! Thanks for entering.

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• Think you’ve got problems? Solve them.
• Five in a Row: Enlarge your Preschooler’s World with Books
• Home Ec 101: An Interview (and Giveaway!) with Heather Solos

It gets me in the mood to reevaluate how we’re doing as a family. To start fresh with new routines and habits. To prepare mindfully for the busy season ahead.

But if you’re like me, it’s all kind-of ironic—these things are meant to help simplify life, but instead, they feel like one more thing to do. These to-do list add-ons eventually make life more stressful, not simpler.

After the summer season, I want to dust off menu plan, wake up early enough again to have alone time, and regularly commit to weekly family meetings with Kyle. But when I try to do all those things, all at once, I stop before I start. It’s too much. I’m overwhelmed.

I’ve got a little something-something up my sleeve, and I’ll pull back the curtain this Friday. Its launch date is to celebrate my birthday, but it’s also deliberate: it’s the Second New Year for us parents. A fresh start feels good right now.

This week, we started our homeschool year. In a few weeks, we start our co-op and Tate starts gymnastics. I’m traveling in 10 days, and then again overseas in a month. Speaking at Relevant. Starting book number two. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and the many little commitments that go with those holidays. New friends, new church, new town… It’s another season of busy for us.

Good things. But busy things. I’ll bet you many of you could say the same thing.

So this thing I’ve got up my sleeve, it’s a nifty tool. But I also hope it’s a gift—not only to you, but to me, too. I need it, so I made it for me, but then I thought it’d be fun to share it with my readers.

I’ve been working long hours to get this tool fleshed out, two other people have their sleeves rolled up in collaboration, and Kyle’s putting in even more hours on the home front so we can get this thing ready.

I’m excited! I love the fall season, busy and all. And I’m eager to share this thing with you on Friday.

What do you have going on right now? Anything new on the horizon? Looking forward to fall?

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• The Second New Year
• Plan for the Holidays: 12 Weeks To an Enjoyable Christmas
• Two ways to make New Year’s Resolutions actually STICK

A few months ago, I managed to fully process my inbox. I went to bed with zero email.

The next morning, a few hours later, I had 38.

I’ve written posts about how to successfully handle email, but that was before my inbox became something of an untamable beast. I’ve read plenty other posts about how to best handle email — classic productivity gurus have espoused their solution with confidence.

Short of declaring total email bankruptcy (which believe me, is tempting), I’ve decided to make peace with my inbox in my own way. Because otherwise, it’ll do me in, mentally, physically, and emotionally.

Here’s how.

1. Unsubscribe, unsubscribe, unsubscribe.

I’ve unsubscribed to just about every mailing list or newsletter out there. I don’t read them anyway, so why bother? They’re not useful to me, and I’m obviously not the target market for those sending them out. I’m wasting their time.

I also think loooooong and hard before signing up on any email lists. Very few are worth it to me — seeing them sit there cause me stress, and they dilute the visibility of the truly valuable emails.

2. Delegate, delegate, delegate.

A few months ago I asked my virtual assistant, Jenny, to handle some of my email (among other tasks). Kyle also receives the email from PR reps, answers the ones he knows how to answer, and forwards me any email from the contact form that I would want to see (like messages from you readers, asking me a question or saying something nice). He saves me the trouble of reading spam, impersonal pitches, or not-so-nice emails from other sorts of people. He’s a great guy.

But it’s not enough — somehow, I still have too much daily email. So when Jenny returns from her maternity leave, I hope to delegate even more email to her. (Hi Jenny! Reading this? I like you.)

3. Attack my inbox like a sniper, not like the mob.

You know those campy mobster movies, where the guys in suits holding tommy guns pull out their weapon and start firing at random, leaving holes in the walls and busting windshields?

That’s how I’ve been handling email: leaving my weapon out for easy access (my inbox), and randomly attacking messages in hopes that I hit a target called “progress.” It’s not working.

I now plan to be a sniper. My literary agent, Jenni (the other Jenny/i in my life), recently let her authors know that she’ll only be processing email twice per day. Leaving her email up all day, she wasn’t getting any quality work done. I wanted to rise up and call her blessed.

Following the advice recently shared on Michael Hyatt’s blog, I’m also returning to my roots of closing my email all but twice per day. I’ll check it once in the morning, and again in the late afternoon. I’ll close out everything else, and only process email for 30 minutes at each sitting.

Those who know me well know how to find me if it’s urgent. I’ve yet to encounter a true email emergency where I’m glad I had my inbox open all day.

4. Don’t touch it until I can take action.

I’ll skim my unread messages and quickly find the most important — they’re from my family, my friends, or a work contact. I’ll read them. But if they need more than a one sentence response, you know what I’ll do?

I’ll mark them as unread. As though somehow, I’m tricking myself into thinking I don’t have to respond because I haven’t yet opened it.

Just plain silly. I’m going back to my roots of only opening email if I can truly take action right then. If I don’t have time, it can wait until my next email session.

5. Redefine “action.”

Honestly, there’s plenty of email that I can just read and either archive or delete. The ones that need a response usually only need a quick one. The writer in me wants to equal my response’s length to the original email’s. But when I wait to make the time to write that lengthy, well-written email, it just never happens.

What would those emailers prefer? A grammatically-correct, beautifully written prose that perfectly spills my thoughts and emotions… but a month later than they were hoping? Or a timely response, perhaps a bit on the short side, but to the point and satisfactory, while still being friendly?

I’m going back to my stance of a five sentence limit. I can count on two hands the times each year I need to write a much longer email that requires a lot of thought. I can make a special occasion for those.

Oh, and I’ll pay it forward for those I’m emailing, adding a short-but-friendly “No need to respond” to each of my messages that only require their eyeballs, not their keyboards. I love it when people do that for me.

6. Make peace with the beast.

All this means there’s a good chance I won’t see “You have no new email messages” from Gmail anytime soon. Or ever. But I’ve decided to be okay with it.

When did it become the mark of a successful day if I got through all my email? When did that trump laundry folding or book reading? I don’t feel guilty when I go to bed and my dishes aren’t perfectly stacked in evenly spaced rows, or that the spines of our books aren’t perfectly aligned on the shelf.

So why does my stomach churn when I open my inbox and see email that I still haven’t opened? It’s really not that big a deal, when you think about it.

Email won’t ever depart my life, and I’m awfully glad I have access to this useful, free tool. But it’s time to give it the rightful place it deserves: just one of several things I do in a productive day. It’s not my master.

What are your favorite tricks for slaying the email beast?

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• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
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• Email: Fail (A Confession and Manifesto)
• Transform Email from Stressful to Useful
• Email: Transform This Tool from Stressful to Useful

If you suffer from perfectionism, like me, then you’ll know what I’m talking about here.

I’ve been staring at this chest of drawers that serves as our family’s craft cabinet for about three weeks. It’s totally disheveled — scrapbook paper rests under a baggie of googly eyes; Christmas ornaments are somehow tucked in amongst the stickers and glitter pens. It honestly hasn’t been organized since we moved here four months ago.

I need to go through it and put things in order. A few hours of shuffling and sorting, and the craft supplies would be organized and easy to find.

But I haven’t started the project because the ideal craft cabinet in my head would take an entire afternoon, and a constantly nursing newborn and two preschoolers in the house means I barely get five minutes to focus on anything.

I’ve put it off because if I can’t do it perfectly, I think it’s better not to touch it at all.

It’s ridiculous, really. When I write it out right now, I realize how childish this thinking is. But there it is… perfectionism freezing me from doing anything at all.

I’m sure none of you can relate, eh?

The theft of perfectionism

When you let perfectionism get the best of you, you end up settling for less.

• If you can’t get a full work out at the gym, you won’t exercise at all.
• Because you don’t have the time or energy to scrub the kitchen counters to a spit shine, you’ll just let the day’s dishes pile up.
• You can’t really afford a full-scale organic garden in the backyard, so it feels pointless to even bother growing potted herbs from the kitchen window.
• Saving for a fully-funded emergency fund feels like it’ll take forever, so why even save your extra 50 bucks a month?

Last week my mother-in-law was in town, and she commented on how she almost never sewed when her kids were little because she could never find the time — until she started sewing 15 minutes at a time here and there, randomly throughout the day.

When she told me this, I was looking at my stacks of fabric and uncut patterns behind her. I knew she was right.

Are there things in your life you’re not enjoying because you can’t dedicate the time you wish you had? Do you have projects left undone, waiting until a perfect storm of time and money crosses your path?

Or are you okay with good enough? Have you found that sweet spot of contentment, where you’re happy with the day trips to the zoo and museum even though a cruise to a tropical island is really your cup of tea?

I encourage you — and me — to make time this weekend to tackle those projects or enjoy little blessings that come your way, even if your life is messy. Spend 10 minutes curled up with a novel when the kids are miraculously quiet. Clear those breakfast dishes and empty the dishwasher, even if you have to leave the kitchen floor unswept. Paint your toenails — your fingernails can wait another day.

Me? I’m going to work on sewing my daughter’s dress and organize some craft supplies. I may only get to one drawer, and I’ll probably thread the machine right when my son spills lemonade down his pants.

But that’s okay… I’m pretty sure I’ll at least get something done.

What have you been putting off? What are you going to do this weekend?

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• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
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• Perfection: the thief of “good enough”
• Drawers & the closet organized: before and after photos
• Spring Cleaning: Day Five

In the 1960s, Charles Hummel published a little booklet called Tyranny of the Urgent, and it quickly became a business classic.  In it, Hummel argues that there is a regular tension between things that are urgent and things that are important — and far too often, the urgent wins.

In the business world, this means that demands of your boss, your client, or petty office relationships can often take priority over things like thoroughly completing a task before starting the next one, or building unity in a work team which would instill camaraderie and longevity.

The urgent, though less important, is prioritized, and therefore the important is put on the back burner.

This is no different in home life. Far too often, we focus on the urgent things in front of us, and at the end of the day, the things we really care about — the important — were barely given a glance.

Here’s what this looks like.

The Urgent

Photo by Andreanna Moyer

A description of the urgent looks different for different families, in different seasons, and even in different hours of the day.  Some examples might be:

• answering the phone
• replying to emails
• changing an exploded diaper
• fixing and kissing an “owie”
• getting bills paid by their due date
• running kids to ballet practice or karate lessons
• watching your neighbor’s children while she desperately runs to the hospital
• cleaning up a spill
• gathering up the clutter before your spouse returns home from work
• going to a scheduled extended family gathering

None of these things are evil.  Yet they often need to be done quickly, or at least at a designated time.

The Important

It’s best to use something like your family’s mission statement to describe your specific important things in life.  But on a daily basis, this list might look like:

• spending time with your spouse
• teaching your children to read
• fostering a spirit of creativity at home
• becoming debt-free
• only having that which you need
• building relationships with your neighbors
• spending quality time outdoors
• taking care of your health
• reusing an item instead of buying new

Where the Urgent and Important Intersect

There are times when the urgent and important are the same thing, so it’s a good thing to focus on this task at hand when it rears its head.

Your bills are due, and you’ve got a long-term plan to become debt-free.  My guess is that paying bills on time is a small part of that plan, so focusing on them today?  Good.

Your neighbor, a single mother with two kids, could use more friends in her life, and to be frank, so could you.  You’d like to get to know her better, and to let her know you’re there for her when she needs it.  So when her toddler splits open his knee and needs stitches asap?  Yes, it’s probably a good idea to drop your afternoon plans and help watch her oldest child.

Where the Urgent and the Important Collide

Photo by Kevin Dooley

It gets ugly when the urgent and the important head butt in a crash collision, and the twisted cacophony makes it awfully difficult to distinguish between the two.  The urgent looks like the important, and vice versa.

You’d like to slow down and have more quality time reading and playing with your children. But after school commitments mean that instead of an hour at the park getting quality outdoor time and exercise with your kids, you have to play taxi and get everyone to their lessons.

In your family, it’s high priority to have dinner together as a family, around the table. But at five o’clock, dinner’s boiling on the stove, your preschooler is whining that she’s bored, and then your mother calls.  You answer the phone because you don’t want your mom to get upset, and instead of letting your daughter solve her own problem, you toss in a DVD to keep her at bay.  All the while, dinner has charred.

You want a tighter rein on your finances, and you’d like to teach your kids the basics of money management and contentment.  But when it’s costume time for the school play, you’re too busy playing taxi, fighting the clutter at home, serving as “team mom” out of guilt, or working at the office 50 hours a week so you can maintain your lifestyle.  So you don’t have time to make a costume.  Sure it would be cheaper, more fun, and teach more life lessons to craft a chicken costume out of things around the house.  But because of time, it’s “easier” to plop down cash and order one online.

Making Life Work for You

Photo by D. Sharon Pruitt

None of these scenarios are evil, mind you. There are times when it’s best to pay for a service over doing it yourself, or to spend quality time with your daughter and order pizza for dinner that night.

But it becomes an issue when this is the modus operandi in your home. When the urgent always trumps the important.

For me, I always keep this in check with I open my email inbox.  I almost always have over 100 unopened emails waiting for me.  But they’re not as high a priority as other things in my life, and I don’t open my emails unless I have the time to answer them right then.  So they wait until I can get to them. It’s hard, but it’s okay.

I encourage you to step back for a few minutes today, and look at the week ahead.  Are there obvious urgencies?  Are they truly urgent?  Then make them a priority.

But are there urgencies disguised as something important?  Does that urgent obligation rob you of time or money you’d rather spend on something truly important to you? See if you can let that urgency fall back in line, and let the important take priority.

It’s stressful, it’s incongruent, and it’s no fun to let the urgent rule our lives.  It’s why we feel like we’re living someone else’s life.  It’s why we want to stand up on the coffee table and scream, “Enough!” to all the chaos.

Be intentional with your time.  Release the guilt you have about fulfilling all the urgencies in your life.  And make it a priority to prioritize at least one truly important thing this week.

In your home, what does it look like when an urgency is disguised as something important?  What do you do to combat the tendency to focus first on the urgent?

CURRENT SPONSORS:

• Plan to Eat - Meal planning made simple.
• MightyNest - Helping create healthy homes.
• Natural Health at Home - Whole food meal plans.
• Clean Mama - Printables that really work for you and make your life easier.
• Again Bags - The reusable snack & sandwich bag.
• UPrinting - Spread your message.
• Oak Meadow - Creative homeschooling since 1975.

© 2008-2012 Simple Living Media, LLC | All rights reserved - This feed is provided for the convenience of Simple Mom subscribers. Any reproduction of the content within this feed is strictly prohibited. If you are reading this content elsewhere, please contact hello@simplemom.net to let us know. Thanks.

• Fighting the Tyranny of the Urgent at Home
• Getting a Grip on Email Chaos
• Redefining Simple Living: Choose Your Priorities