Simple Mom

by Crystal on May 24, 2013 • 7 Comments Kids: Developing Character

Two poems about single parenting

Today, I wanted to share two poems about my experience of single parenting. These poems chronicle the strange adjustment from being married to becoming a single parent, and how that affects both your children and your own ideas and habits about parenting.

The first poem, “Happy,” was written during lots of upheaval, when my son was very young and the going-back-and-forth between mommy and daddy was not yet routine. It’s better now, but for a while there, every exchange was heartbreaking.

I don’t have any tips to impart to make that easier. It’s just hard on everyone.

It’s like the extreme version of ending an awesome play date. Any kid has a hard time leaving somewhere he’s having fun and feeling good. Even if both homes are positive and loving, the transition can be challenging.

I think the best thing we can do for our kids in this situation is just acknowledge aloud that we understand it’s hard to leave one home and go to another. Instead of trying to convince them it’s not a big deal to get them to calm down, communicate that it IS a big deal.
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by Tsh on May 23, 2013 • 25 Comments Announcement

Summer podcastin’, and the living’s easy…

It’s almost summer here in the northern hemisphere (though it certainly doesn’t feel like it here in Oregon to this native Texan—it snowed yesterday!), and when this season dawns, I like to slow things down a bit. The to-do list never ends when you work for yourself, but it does mean that you can take off a random Tuesday and spend it floating down a river. I like that.

My kids will be home, we’ll be traveling, and there are plenty of pool and lake days with my name on them, library book in tow. The same goes for my friends I podcast with, and so we’re gonna slow them down a bit. Just for a few months.

We record The Simple Mom Podcast (almost) weekly, and though I know several of you have said you wished they were daily, there’s actually quite a bit of work that goes in to producing them—not to mention juggling two mamas’ schedules to get in a good recording. I absolutely LOVE making them; they’re one of my favorite parts of this weird gig I do. I mean, who wouldn’t love a fabulous excuse to talk to six wonderful women on a regular basis?

But for the summer, we’re going to be producing them every other week, so that we can make the most of our summer with our families. I know, you can throw tomatoes at me. I think you’ll manage. (That was sarcastic, if you couldn’t tell. It’s not always obvious on the Internet.)

Here’s the recent podcasts from the past few months, if you’ve missed out on some:

• The Wayback, with cohost Megan Tietz

• Gauntlet Month, with cohost Kat Lee

• Father Hen, with cohost Hayley Morgan

• Compliment Sandwich, with cohost Lisa Leonard

• Be a Good You, with cohost Emily Freeman (a special episode dedicated entirely to the 5% collective wisdom we share on book publishing)

• Talk About Magic, with cohost Megan Tietz

• The Plate Whisperer, with cohost Myquillyn Smith (aka The Nester)

I’m so grateful that so many of you listen! They really are a joy to create.

And in the meantime, I’d love to hear what you’d like to hear us discuss on the podcasts! Any topics that pique your interest? You can always email me questions using the contact form, or feel free to toss out ideas here in the comments.

by Megan on May 22, 2013 • 20 Comments Fashion

Dress yourself in story

My fingers found their way to the earrings in my earlobes and began the subconscious ritual of twisting them around and around while we waited.

I’ve been twisting my earrings in moments of stress since I was in the 3rd grade, standing next to mean old Mrs. Boyd’s desk reciting my multiplication tables. I would sway back and forth, sweating in my sneakers, twisting away on those earring studs while I stammered out three times one is three, three times two is six, three times three is three …

And so there I was three months ago, sweating in a hospital bed in the OR prep room, having found out only hours earlier that our twin baby boys were to be born that day, and naturally, I resorted to that familiar comfort of twisting my earrings.

I was just a few twists of the diamond studs in when I felt a small burst of panic. Ugh, I groaned. I was supposed to leave these at home. I can’t go into surgery with them in my ears.

It’s no surprise at all that I forgot to take them out. With very few exceptions, those diamond studs are in my earlobes around the clock. I’m not a fancy jewelry person. In fact, those earrings and my wedding ring are the only pieces of jewelry I own that have any worth to them at all. I don’t wear those earrings to be fancy. I wear them because in a very tangible way, they remind me of who I am.
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by Tsh on May 21, 2013 • 154 Comments Travel Your Family

Around the world

So I’ve alluded some here on the blog, a bit on Instagram, and hinted around a bit on Facebook, but I haven’t been too specific about our plans yet, simply because they’re still etched in lightweight pencil with an eraser nearby. But enough of you have asked, and it’s not a secret, so I figured I’d go ahead and tell you:

Next year, my family and I will be traveling around the world.

We’ve wanted to do this for a very, very long time, so this isn’t a rash decision. Ever since we moved back from Turkey three years ago (has it really been three years already?), we knew we wanted to get back “out there” and explore. So the concrete is still very mushy on our plans (in fact, you could say we’re still mixing it), but we’re planning on traveling for the 2014-15 school year. So, a bit over a year from now.

I’ll be writing about our plans a bit more this next year, as we learn about places, glean advice from friends doing the same thing, and make global connections, but today, I thought I’d address one of the bigger questions I get. It’s this one:

Why?

(There’s also How? and Where?, but those are separate posts for another day.)

So, here’s why.

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by Tsh on May 20, 2013 • 39 Comments Personal Growth You

Be the boss of you

As you start this week, may you be courageous and bold enough to do the things that are good and healthy for you, the things you know make you a better grownup and more in to who you’re made to be.

I distinctly remember this one evening after visiting some family friends late into the night, when I was soundly sleeping in the backseat, my head propped on the side of the car and my body rolled up in a self-made cocoon. I’m guessing I was about 8 or 9, and we had just pulled up into our driveway; my dad turned off the ignition and my mom gathered my younger brother, also sleeping, in her arms.

“Tsh. Tsh. Time to wake up. We’re home,” my mom said, and then she turned toward the house with her arms full. I wondered—if I sat still long enough, would one of my parents return to the car to carry me, too? Maybe they’ll think I’m sound asleep and didn’t hear them. Or maybe they’ll have pity on my too-big body and schlep my dead weight over their shoulder.

A few seconds passed of stillness and silence, and no one came back for me. This is when I realized: I was too big to be carried in any more. I was growing up, and part of that meant not getting to be a baby. Most of the time, that was cool. But at 11 p.m., when I wanted someone else to do the getting out, the walking up the driveway, the clothes changing, and the teeth brushing, I was bummed that I didn’t get an official memo when that part of my life ended. Somehow, I blinked and missed that phase between being small enough to be babied and big enough to now do some big things myself.

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